Bluff That Mugger!

If you live in a big city.. or a small town, for that matter... the odds are that sooner or later you're gonna be mugged! So, as a public service, I offer these lines of dialogue calculated to Bluff That Mugger! Of course if the choosen line fails to work, you can still beat the crap out of them with your Martial Arts skills.

  1. Gee, you're the first person that's spoken to me since I escaped from the Insane Asylum's Violent Ward!
  2. Help yourself! I just want to warn you! Since I saw "Papillon," I keep my money in a strange place!
  3. Beat it! There's a Yakoza Contract out on me, and anybody that's seen with me is as good as dead!
  4. You're welcome to it! I'm sick and tired of trying to pass these marked bills from the ransom!
  5. Congratulations! You're gonna be the tenth muggerKung Fu!
  6. Sure, I've got something for you! Where do you want it... in the belly of the head?
  7. Great! This'll give me a good workout for my upcoming title fight with Foreman!
  8. no, no! You're doing it all wrong! Let an EXPERIENCED mugger show you how!
  9. That's it! Fantastic! You're exactly the actor I need for my next picture!
  10. Take it all! I'm dying from a highly-contagious disease anyway!
  11. Okay, boys! Our stakeout worked! Come and get'im!
  12. Oh, God! Please don't let me kill AGAIN!!!

[ INDEX ] Back to Phil's homepage.